In my last Monday Musings post, I talked about my experience of moving a lot during childhood, and also chronicled the moves that G and I have done since getting married. I had planned to write more about the emotions connected to moving, but as often happens in my life, I got a little sidetracked. I’m going to try to stay focused on the emotions of moving with this post.
Fear-I haven’t had a move where fear wasn’t a significant factor since I was two years old. It’s always scary to pick up your life and leave everything behind. Even when life is hard and causing you pain or frustration, there is an element of fear when you leave it all behind. There is no real way to know whether a move will make things better or worse. Fear is not necessarily a bad thing, though, it can be used to help us to figure out what we really want out of life.
Excitement-Generally, I feel at least a little excited whenever I move. It can be very exciting to thing about ho your life will be different in your new place. It can also be very exciting to explore new places, and meet new people. Sometimes that excitement can be a bad thing, though. I know people who seem to be addicted to that kind of excitement, who need it to feel alive. Sometimes we get caught up in that excitement to avoid dealing with the things in our life that are hard or scary. That cycle can be very hard to stop, so I advise against starting it if at all possible.
Sadness-Every move I can remember has involved a certain amount of sadness, even the ones that I desperately needed to make. For me, the moves that needed to happen have actually been the hardest. I find it incredibly sad to feel like there is nothing truly connecting you to a place and time in your life. It’s definitely sad to leave behind friends, family, and a place you love, but at least you will have happy memories. When you leave a place that you have no connection to, it can feel like that part of your life was wasted and that you can never get it back.
Growth-Anytime you make a significant move, it is an opportunity for growth. It doesn’t matter whether it is a completely new place where you don’t know anyone or if you are moving back to your hometown. In a new place, you can start over and be someone different if you want to. When you move back to your hometown, you are bringing with you all the experiences you had while you were away. Whether or not a move lives up to your expectations, it will still offer a chance for growth.
To move or not to move-If you are questioning whether or not to make a significant move, I suggest looking at how all these emotions are influencing you. For a move to be successful they should generally be felt equally. That isn’t to say that sometimes your need to move isn’t more important that the emotions involved. For a move like that is important to remember why you are doing it. It may be because of a job, or it could be because the need to start over is greater than anything else, but it won’t be successful if you don’t remember why you are making the move in the first place. Regardless of why you move, try to remember that life takes time. Most people don’t make a big move, and automatically feel like life is perfect. Moving is hard and stressful, but can also give you more than you ever anticipated if you let it.